by Danielle Enriquez AMFT #128151
We are just a little over halfway through Lent of 2024. Where does the time go? It felt like yesterday that I was waking up early with my family to receive ashes. That being said, I can imagine that some of you are thriving in your Lenten promises – that is great! On the contrary, maybe there are some of you – like me – who are struggling to keep up with your Lenten promise amongst the hustle and bustle of daily life. If that is the case, please know that you are not alone – I see you.
Rejoice
It can feel completely disheartening to realize that another day has passed and another day of being completely immersed in life’s obligations have kept us away from enacting our Lenten promise. Have you ever felt frustrated, or have you ever asked yourself the following – how is it that I keep struggling to set aside time to be intentional with God? If so – again – you are not alone! This past Sunday, the church celebrated what is called Laetare Sunday. Laetare is Latin for rejoice. As people of faith, we can rejoice in knowing that “He is Risen.” We can also rejoice in knowing that God never fails to love us and rejoice in knowing that God never gives up on us. Pope Francis that stated “God never tires of forgiving us; we are the ones who tire of seeking His mercy.”
Our Goal is to Maintain Peace
Catholic social media is an inspiring place; however, social media can often create a tendency for one to compare one’s experience to the experience of another. It was once stated that “comparison is the thief of joy.” Just as I communicate to my clients, the only person one can compare oneself to is – you guessed it – yourself! Life is complex, but Jesus is the Prince of Peace. He does not want us to struggle with losing our peace. According to Fr. Jacque Philippe, “the first goal of spiritual combat […] is not to always obtain victory (over our temptations, our weakness, etc.), rather it is to learn to maintain peace of heart under all circumstances, even in the case of defeat” (2002 & p.12). Despite our trials and broken expectations, our goal is to maintain peace throughout the entire experience.
Practical Tips to Consider
Stay in the present moment. Everyday is a new opportunity to embrace the day that God has given us – the moment that God has given us. Matthew 6:34 communicates, “therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day’s own trouble be sufficient for the day.” One simple strategy I want to pass along to you is to repeat the following, “I am right here, right now and God is with me.”
Progress NOT Perfection. Everything is about progress and not perfection. We have to have self-compassion and be gentle with ourselves throughout everything in life. God is not calling us to be perfect, but God is asking us to keep trying. Consider the following question – can I accept that I missed a day or 3 weeks of not doing my Lenten promise?
Challenge All or Nothing Thoughts. Our thoughts can be powerful. Our thoughts can feel real. However, our thoughts are just that – thoughts. If a thought is unhelpful, we have to be cognizant and recognize that this “stinking thinking” is not helping. Cognitive distortions are errors in our thinking. One common cognitive distortion is called all or nothing thinking, and this thought is referencing an all or nothing mentality. As an illustration, if we fail one day to do our Lenten promise, then we might think, “I failed again, so I might as well give up.” Lets challenge this unhelpful thought and affirm – in the words of, R&B singer, Aaliyah, “if at first you don’t succeed then dust yourself off and try again; you can dust it off and try again, try again.”
God is a Good Father.God can be trusted. The Holy Spirit will guide you, today, tomorrow, and always! God is willing your good and desires for you to walk a path of holiness. Everyone’s path to holiness will look different. Let us consider the lives of the saints. Praise be God that He created us so uniquely. Let that sink in – our journey to Heaven is going to be unique as well!
Key Takeaway
I had a wise friend share with me that our journey does not end with Lent. In fact, our journey of growing in faith is a lifelong commitment. Essentially, it is imperative that we do not limit ourselves to just one liturgical season of intentional praying, fasting, and almsgiving because – as Catholics – we are called to do these three important themes throughout our entire lives. Remember, in the words of Fr. Jacques, “[the goal] is to learn to maintain peace of heart under all circumstances, even in the case of defeat.”
Feel free to reach out to Danielle with questions or to schedule an appointment by emailing her at danielle.enriquez.a@gmail.com
References
Philippe, J. (2002). Searching for and maintaining peace. Society of St. Paul.
Laetare Sunday – Fourth Sunday of Lent. (n.d.) Retrieved March 10, 2024, from https://www.dioceseoflansing.org/general/laetare-sunday-fourth-sunday-lent
Adam Cross LMFT 